I was troubled

I heard a bit of the confirmation hearings for the Supreme Court nominee Samuel Alito. The word “troubled” was used a few times. As in, “This troubles me.” Here is another word that needs to be retired. Using a word or phrase to describe your emotional state as a basis for decision making is something that is common for us. A friend of mine put it this way.

One hundred years ago you wouldn’t hear people saying, “I feel” when they were trying to make a point. It would be “I think.”

If the intent of the Senators using the term “troubled” was meant to sound ominous, they were actually telling us quite a bit about themselves.

Feelings-based decision making= “I was troubled”
Thinking-based decision making= “I have concerns”

For an interesting exercise on this topic, pay attention to how many times you or someone else says, “I feel…” when dealing with some decision that is coming up. Now, you are probably not going to say it, but I feel you might!